I insist on hanging out in bars. It will ultimately be to my detriment and part of me knows this. Still- at times, I can’t help myself.

I neither feel good or bad inside the all too comfortable confines of these establishments, I’m just “there”. I rarely go to any that are within my home zip code- preferring instead some kind of anonymity. I’m not sure that the effort pays any dividends for it is painfully clear to all within the place that, upon my arrival and then demeanor, a non-drinker; more specifically, a recovering alcoholic is within the midst of an otherwise good time. But, I can say that if I were to go to my former haunts, the chances of my actually starting to drink again, due to peer pressure and out and out memories, would be far too great. I can’t really have that, besides- to drink or start drinking again is not what I’m after. Actually, it’s the last thing that I’m after…

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